It is gnawing away tonight,

the alien, the parasite,

the body’s own black dog

with sharpened claws

and rabid spittle chocked teeth

is eating away at the spine

and I want to scream

this is not who I am…

 

but I left it far too late,

procrastinating

about Time,

always Time,

in which to reason with the parasite

that gnaws at my spine…

 

reason…

 

how to reason with the enemy within

and how to keep arguing

keep it talking as it holds me

hostage, as I keep being driven

to get thoughts down

as thought may be a hurricane,

a tempest, but still,

quietly, hushed, thought

is free…

 

a different path, one

that led me to this point regardless,

one where the parasite was cleansed

out of the body,

chemical warfare on my aching

body, where I would sit in contemplation,

reading, writing and not stressed

the parasite out,

gentle reason, not aggressive

behaviour in which it retaliated…

 

I should have been you,

you sweet love,

would have held this parasite

at bay.

 

Ian D. Hall 2016