So when does the mid-life crisis actually begin,

as I am sure that I am eligible to claim around now,

being too old to truly wear jeans

but wearing them just to rebel against

the condemnation of the teens

and the look of unruly disaffection of my grandfather’s

era who once married and with children of their own

reverted to looking as if they had stepped out of stage

managed Victorian costume drama and the stiff upper lip

kept the emotions in check.

 

I keep looking through the spyglass in my door

in hope that outside on the pavement,

as all rebels should behave, there is a Harley being revved,

purring softly my name between each growl of thunder,

take me for a ride big boy, show me what you have got… if you have the stomach.

The sound of the mechanical love machine

pounding away as if a Dave Gilmour solo was being

etched permanently into my mind, the sound of beauty

realised in devastating form.

 

All the things you can get away with under the guise of the

Mid-life breakdown, the hardened drinking, the parties

and the drugs, the rebelling of fortune and being

like a teenager on heat once more,

truly, surely, must be a thrill to behold,

but far too exhausting to contemplate with serious intent,

already knackered beyond contempt,

the Harley ridden across America and then

through the miles of the outback

of the Australian sunset,

just a dream that the drunks in the bar

slagging off the poet as he weeps the tears of condemned

cannot even think of as the fun of the Mid-life crisis passes them by.

 

Perhaps my Mid-life crisis has been and gone,

the thought of hitting back and snarling in the face of old age

just a memory that my teenage years alluded too

as I let myself down just once too often.

The Harley ride, the virginal trail blazing discovery,

the long lost path

reignited with Kerosene, bridges burned to a crisp

and the thought, undeniably twenty-first Century modern

day thinking, that feeling the tiredness of life

will stop the crisis in its tracks.

 

Ian D. Hall 2015