Another turned down invitation,

one that wasn’t meant,

one that designed to encourage

one nodded at but underneath

the spluttering search for solitude

commences;

not that I want to be alone,

not that I crave to be isolated

and abandoned, it is just…

well easier to not be in people’s way,

to feel the cruelty of hope

of a conversation that didn’t switch

to feeling guilty, of opening up

about my fears and dreams,

dreams that are smashed with

the sledgehammer eyebrow raised,